On March 13th in Thailand, it was National Elephant Day. As THIS link shows, it seems to be about young Thai ladies in dresses and Elephants doing paintings. What is not shown is the possibility that the “ladies” could well be doing a little “tucking back”. If you know what I mean.
But that is irrelevant to the day; and even those men with the wanton need to dress as a woman and try to sleep with rich Westerners should be able to celebrate a huge grey thing with a long trunk. Which is NOT tucked back to create an illusion of being something other to what it was born as.
But all this talk of playing hide the sausage has got us away from the main reasons for this post.
I was going to say that we should celebrate the trusty squirrel with National Squirrel Day. A day where we get to look at a small furry animal and it’s nuts and how they grab big handfuls of them and hide them away for the winter. But then I realised 2 things. 1) That takes us back to the whole Thailand Tuckback situation, and 2) Squirrel Appreciation Day is on January 21st every year.
So that ruined that one.
Knowing this, I figured we could maybe celebrate the trusty Beer Can. Something that has brought pleasure (well the contents has, but the vessel to bring it in still has an importance) to my life on a night out or a night in. Once again I realised 2 things. 1) In a bar, you get bowls of nuts. So we are still celebrating nuts in a way, and 2) January 24th. Beer Can Appreciation Day.
Therefore I decided to go the way of the fake deity. To something that I don’t think exists. So I chose Jesus. We could celebrate Jesus. Once again, 2 things. 1) 25th December. Someone got in there first and already celebrates it, and 2) Your nuts right? You may as well celebrate an Elephant.
I dug down deep. What could we celebrate? Ah-Haaaa! Waffles. No… someone would have done that, so how about Waffle Iron Day! Yeah! Who would have thought of that one!!! 2 things. 1) June 29th each and every year already. 2) People are frigging nuts and will celebrate anything .
After much deliberating, all I have come up with is that I don’t intend to create one. Instead, on October 22nd, I will celebrate National Nut Day.
Unfortunately for my gorgeous wife, on the day our first child is due, it is “Thread the Needle Day”. No, really. If sprogly comes bang on time, she isn’t gonna be happy when I tell her this.
© 2008, Sy. All rights reserved.
on 
12 responses so far ↓
1 Jim - Just a Guy
// Mar 19, 2008 at 3:52 am
She may just slap the hell out you.
2 Sy
// Mar 19, 2008 at 3:53 am
She might be a lot smaller then me…but I think you might be right on this one Jim!
3 Rose
// Mar 19, 2008 at 4:22 am
They have a day for everything don’t they? lol
4 Sy
// Mar 19, 2008 at 4:24 am
They really do. Absolutely everything. Some days are used to celebrate several things at once!
5 Jim - Just a Guy
// Mar 19, 2008 at 8:36 am
When is bloggers Day?
6 Sy
// Mar 19, 2008 at 9:15 am
Hmmm. It seems to differ in certain countries!! But according to blogday.org, it is August 31st.
7 Anca
// Mar 19, 2008 at 3:50 pm
We are all nuts! We have all this holidays to celebrate, we should have a party every day, be it Elephant or Beer Can Day (this would be a more appropiate occasion). I’m pretty sure today, March 19, there’s some kind of big celebration of something, and I’m totally missing it. I’m sitting at my computer typing, when I should be worshipping some animal or product. Darn it, Sy! All your fault
8 Anca
// Mar 19, 2008 at 3:52 pm
I’ve just published your wonderful story here:
http://megavegalicious.com/2008/03/19/how-sy-won-25-big-ones-in-vegas/
Thank you so much Sy!
9 Jim - Just a Guy
// Mar 19, 2008 at 7:04 pm
So Aug 31 where do bloggers unite to celebrate. I am picturing a large ball room full of people sitting at long tables each one them with a laptop out and open. I hear nothing but the taping of keys and the swearing under the breath as they make another typo. Occasionally someone yells out “OK whoever photo shopped me getting raped by horse is going to pay for that!” I think the event could be quite fun.
10 Tamera
// Mar 19, 2008 at 7:09 pm
Ha! This was brilliant. Where do they come from? *walking to the kitchen as the title challenges me to do, and grabbing my bag of peanuts holding them up for Sy to see* There’s my nuts! Nope, Sy. Sprogly ain’t gonna be happy about that one at all!
11 Sy
// Mar 19, 2008 at 7:18 pm
@Anca – Look up Laptop or PC appreciation day! That will keep you going for a while! And you can justify the time spent! See! It is alllll good!! Oh, and thanks for posting the story!
@Jim – Hmmm. Is there a bowl of fruit on the tables which doesn’t get eaten? Instead we leave packets of crips about the place and leave empty cans on the floor. Or is this only me? Hmmm… Now. Where is my installation of Photoshop? I have some work to do here. Ahhh…hellooooo Mr Horsey! Assume the position while I get a photo!
@Tamera – Nice Nuts! I see that is an impressively large bag full! What kind oare they? The parrot would appreciate some if you can spare any!
12 Jim - Just a Guy
// Mar 19, 2008 at 8:06 pm
Of course there would be free coffee and energy drinks. the food of course would all be snack fook that you could eat with one hand while typing with the other. At meal breaks they would serve real food but no one would get up to go eat or move their lap top to eat where they are. Also the tables would be split up into groups. you would have your professional make money blogging bloggers all copying and pasting what each other posts. You would have your table of 20 something girls that think they are still in high school. one table of middle aged men discussing great porn and adult humor. A table for random babbling idiots such as ourselves. A table for of miscellaneous. A table of movie whores who think they know whats going on in Hollywood. Perez Hilton would be banned from attending. A table of Sci/fi freaks to include but not limited to fans of the following Firefly, Star Wars, Star Trek, Stargate SG1, Babylon 5, Battle Star Galactica, Isaac Asimov and others. One table of tech geeks debating over some random theory. One table would have both religious bloggers and atheists together just for fun. If I missed anything major I am sure you will fill in the blanks. Just an idea since we are having so much fun with this, you want to collaborate with me to write this sucker out and publish it on both our sites. Hit me up through email on my about me page.
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